This time, I sent sex-voiced Texan a photo of a pose I liked as inspiration: casual, leaning against a wall, hat in hand, boots on, jeans, no shirt.
He sent me three pictures: two variations of that pose, and one off-script photo featuring his bound hands, the boots and hat in shot.
I am (almost literally) floored by my visceral reaction to how beautiful he is. But it’s not JUST his beauty. It’s the fact … Continue Reading
Yesterday I had a second voice call with the sex-voiced Texan.
Early afternoon my time, 8pm his time. “So that you get to bed at a reasonable hour,” I said (our last call was 4.5 hours long).
When I call him, his webcam flickers. He beams at me with his killer smile.
I never asked him to turn his cam on but I love watching him when we talk. His face is expressive and … Continue Reading
As always when I don’t really feel like hitting ‘publish’ on any of my ramblings, I end up doing a general ‘what’s going on with me’ post, and sometimes that’s enough to kick me out of my stupor, so here it is.
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I had a couple of minor surgical procedures in the last few weeks (don’t worry, lovely readers, they are no big deal). One was to take care of some stuff, one was … Continue Reading
I had this email exchange with the sex-voiced Texan.
Me: Do you have a cowboy hat? You must have one, right? Never you mind why I’m asking…
Him: Of course I do…My curiosity is piqued… But I’ll just answer the question.
Me: Well of course you do! :D And cowboy boots right (that’s a dumb question isn’t it?)?
Him: I’m smiling right now because those questions are very particular. I should have some in … Continue Reading
Hi Ferns.
I have been spellbound by your relationship with your first. One because you have talked about it so b’fully and secondly because despite being deeply submissive I can be the the kind of person who would not give his mistress the shirt he was about to throw away.
Having aspergers I have considerable difficulty understanding people’s intentions and having been emotionally manipulated and bullied as a child I can be quite suspicious. I … Continue Reading
There is something between us.
He felt it early on, some pull towards me, ghosts of our D/s relationship tugging at something in him.
You still have a hold over me. How? Why?
I hate it.
Is there something about submitting to a person that can never be undone?
He has never submitted to anyone else, so it makes sense that as he has unravelled past hurts and the idea of submission comes tentatively floating … Continue Reading
I’ve written about the things I screwed up in my relationship with my First and touched on how I didn’t feel loved.
One of the things that I learnt from that relationship is that submissive behaviours can obscure traits that I would have seen a mile off in a vanilla man, but didn’t yet have the experience to see in a submissive. If you overlay ‘submission’ on a relationship, it can be harder to pinpoint … Continue Reading