The proposition leads to a yes leads to a discussion leads to a negotiation.I send him a play list. It lists all the activities that I may want to do with him.
It is not a ‘will do’ list. It is a ‘might, possibly, maybe, if it feels right, these are in the realms of possibility’ list.
He gets to rate them from 0 to 5, he gets to add to them, he gets to say ‘No’.
0 means you have utterly no desire to do that activity and don’t like doing it (in fact, may loath it) and would ordinarily object to doing it, but you would do it if I really wanted it
…
5 means the activity is a wild turn-on for you
- Being left in bondage (5-10 minutes)
- Being undressed (to boxer briefs)
- Biting (gentle)
- Blindfold
- Collar (wearing)
- Eye contact restrictions (not allowed to raise eyes/look at something)
- Gag
- Kissing
- Kneeling
- Leash (being led)
- Leash (wearing)
- Photos (of rope work, not face)
- Physical inspection
- Pinching (gentle)
- Being restrained (eg wrist/ankle cuffs tied to something)
- Rope bondage (ha!)
- Using honorific (Ma’am)
- Voice restrictions (not allowed to talk)
- Wearing ankle cuffs
- Wearing wrist cuffs
10 comments
Reading posts like this on are bittersweet. Mistress and I were together for many years before we were kinky so there weren't really any exchanges like this with each other. At least I can live vicariously.. thank you Ferns
Secretive Slave: “Mistress and I were together for many years before we were kinky so there weren't really any exchanges like this with each other.”
No, but I imagine the exploration by the two of you when you knew and loved each other already was a sweetness with a very rich flavour.
“At least I can live vicariously.. thank you Ferns”
*smile* You're very welcome.
Ferns
how fun! i love the 'play list' and subsequent rating system. great concept!
xo mina
No boot worship ? For shame :)
Coug
Good list. I like it. “Gentle” biting means no blood … Right?
Mina: “how fun! i love the 'play list' and subsequent rating system. great concept!”
Thanks, and yes, fun! He is a sweet and very nervous newbie and I want him to know exactly what is on the table.
Ferns
Coug: “No boot worship ? For shame”
*laugh* Yeah, you'd think with my shoe/boot obsession, it would be a staple!
Ferns
slapshot: “Good list. I like it.”
Thanks. My aim with it is twofold:
1. To practice my rope skills (of which I have exactly none) and
2. To give him a lovely, gentle, positive first experience
I think it's a nice mix for that.
“”Gentle” biting means no blood … Right?”
Definitely no blood!!
Ferns
I’d be a gooey loved up mess busily filling in the 5’s should you offer me a list like that, but I’m a bit surprised that noone has commented on one aspect: “0 means you have utterly no desire to do that activity … but you would do it if I really wanted it”. That reads more like “take this entire list, and trust me, or leave it, I’m not *really* giving a choice on the individual items”. It could leave more scope for negotiation!
You seem to have missed this at the start:
“A yes leads to a discussion leads to a negotiation.”, so we had already had those talks by the time I sent him the playlist.
You also seemed to have missed this:
“He gets to rate them from 0 to 5, he gets to add to them, he gets to say ‘No’.
Perhaps you should read more of my content to get a broader context of who I am before you assume the worst.
Ferns