Casual maybe

I’m shit at casual anything. I’m normally either all-in and want to give and get everything, or I’m out. Because ‘meh’. But sometimes, rarely, I am open to other options.

Considering service submission was one example, and being open to something non-LTR-ish with the cougarling is another.

I offered to see the cougarling again in my last email to him even though I didn’t think that developing a long term relationship over distance was going to work for us:

I enjoyed so much about our time together: you’re lovely, and you’re so beautiful, and I feel like there is more to explore. I’d be delighted to see you again to kiss and pet and play some more if you would enjoy that also.

While our communication didn’t work for a potential LTR, when we were together, there was much to enjoy about his 6’3 of awesome pretty and I was keen to get my hands on some more of that.

We exchanged some sweet and flirty texts after I sent that email, so I knew we were fine with each other. He didn’t come back to my email directly, but he would, he said.

Some time passed and I expected nothing more from him, I was happy with how we left things. It was sweet and respectful and mutually kind.

Then the loveliest email landed in my inbox, a long and thoughtful list of all of the ways that I made him smile, and all of the things that he enjoyed about our time together.

I still have this lovely image in my head of the first time I saw you, when you walked into the bar. Tall, beautiful and smiling. That is how I remember you despite time and place. You have the most amazing smile and it make me melt when you in a soft and charming voice call me beautiful. Not only does it makes me feel all warm inside, but it also ignites my submissive side more than you might know.

*swoon*

He said he felt bad that he couldn’t communicate in the way I wanted and needed, but it’s just how he is wired, and I’m glad he is self aware enough to know that. Perhaps if he was local it wouldn’t have been an issue. Who knows. Either way, he agreed with my assessment that our communication mismatch meant that a long term relationship was untenable.

And at the end of his email, he said he’d like to see me again if my offer was still on the table. Hell yes it is *smile*. I replied with enthusiasm:

… yes, the offer is still on the table: it’s rare that I get my hands on someone as beautiful as you who I like and feel safe with, and I do think there is a lot more potential for enjoying you in different ways. You are most welcome in my lair, in my rope, and in my bed.

It’s a 24 hour return trip for him, so I have no idea when, or indeed if, he will make it, but I’m happy for it to be a ‘casual maybe’ floating out there in the ether.